From Scattered to Focused
How to drop the overwhelm and get focused & productive in your business!
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I used to be a part-time hoarder. I loved nick-nacks, I had a hard time throwing out old gift bags; I would buy random things that would be “good gifts to have on hand” when they were on sale or clearance, because I wanted to have little gifts available at a moment’s notice to give to someone. I didn’t realize at the time that I had a problem and it was affecting me energetically.
My energy hoarding drove my husband nuts, but he is a quiet zen type and let me sort this out for myself… sort of (pun intended)
According to the diciontary a horder is someone who gathers or accumulates (hoards).
Looking back now, I can see that it wasn’t only things that I was accumulating. I held on to stories, and tried to control the energy of situations too. I would replay experiences over and over and over again. I couldn’t let things go.
What I didn’t realize is that thoughts, things, stories, experiences- they are all energy. And holding on to them clutters up our energy field, keeping you focused on more of what you don’t really want or need, and preventing yourself from moving forward.
Here are the 3 ways people hoard energy:
Well, I certainly was gathering and accumulating things. I think I needed to have stuff to feel worthy. To feel validated that I was “rich” to some degree, because I had stuff.
My letting go has happened gradually over time, and there is certainly much more I could let go of. A turning point for me was when I went away and my husband cleaned out some stuff for me- a little things as simple as gift bags. I had probably about 50 gift bags. Different sizes and for different occasions, because you can always use a gift bag to wrap a gift right? But my gift bag box was overflowing. He pitched half of them.
I was ANGRY when I discovered this. How could he do that? If we needed gift bags that Christmas HE was going to have to buy them, because it would be his fault that we need it.
It took me time to realize that he was doing me a favour.
Those gift bags were one simple thing that was taking up space and energy in our home. And I had a really hard time letting them go.
I came face to face with how silly I was being when I was helping a friend clean out a closet in her very full home. She too had a gift bag collection. It was so magnificent that you could start a gift bag museum with the different types and sizes of bags. She literally had hundreds of gift bags. And I was only able to convince her to part with a handful that were ripped on the side. Ok Universe. I got it. My gift bag collection was not serving me, just as it wasn’t serving my friend.
Try reading Marie Condo’s book the Life Changing Magic of Tidying up. Marie is a professional organizer in Japan. This book will teach you why it is important to surround you with things that you Love. And how to kindly let everything else go. The openness that is created by letting go of that energy is powerful and … life changing.
I tormented myself for years (and I still have the occasional relapse), with replaying situations from days, months, years and even decades before. Situations that had gone wrong, and that I wish I had done differently. I would replay them over and over again, creating anxiety and preventing me from getting a good night’s sleep.
By me repeatedly playing back these experiences and in my head and my heart, I was keeping my current self tied to the energy of the past, preventing me from moving forward.
My emotional well being was suffering on so many levels: physically (I was exhausted), emotionally (focusing on the low feelings), and mentally (I was in a fog and didn’t believe I could do my work).
There are two strategies I suggest.
One, is the Hawaiian Ho’oponopono Prayer:
This simple prayer of forgiveness releases the ties between you and the other people in the situations. It heals the energy and helps to set you free. When a situation that is stressing you our arises, you can simply recite the prayer.
I Love you
I’m sorry
Please forgive me
Thank you
Secondly, love yourself:
When you love and value yourself, recognizing that you are enough and perfect the way you are, you build self confidence. This helps you to focus on the good that is happening in your life, see the lessons to be learned from the past experiences, and know that you are no longer that person, so you can let that go and be happy with who you are right now.
I didn’t realize how much of a control freak I was. I still am a bit, but I (think) have gotten better at this.
The person who is a control freak wants to control the energy of the situation. They want things to be done their way and when they want it, and they have expectations of the outcome. This doesn’t leave much room for co-creation, development or growth for any of the parties involved.
Share the creation process. Trust in others and their ability. You just may learn something and it will deepen your relationship. There really is no other way. You simply need to surrender control and trust. It is actually quite liberating.
It was through giving up control, that I was able to discover my gifts and what makes my heart sing. Quite frankly, my big logical brain certainly never would have picked inspiring people to connect with their soul and discover their soul’s purpose as my career choice, and yet, I can’t imagine doing anything else.
When you stop trying to hoard the energy around you, you open yourself up to a new level of discovery. As soon as you begin to let go, you create space to let new experiences in.
As scary as it may seem to let go, your soul will truly thank you and you’ll be surprised at what new opportunities open up for you.
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How to drop the overwhelm and get focused & productive in your business!
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